I’ve had people ask me since Holly and I started telling people that we were together why we don’t still go to the church we used to go to in college. For those of you who don’t know: that’s where we met. Yes, gay lesbians. I know, I know, such a shock! Anyway. It always seems like a simple enough answer in my head. I always feel like I shouldn’t have to explain myself to people. And sometimes it sucks.
I’ve recently began working in childcare at a church here in Manhattan, and the only one I know is affirming of LGBTQ+ individuals.
That’s where the inspiration for this post came from. Any church in Manhattan can claim that they are open, and I do believe they are. But, let’s just put a plot twist on things: say I walk into one of these churches holding Holly’s hand; it’s something we do often in public because hey, we’re in love, we’re getting married, get the picture? I can already feel the stares I would get. I can already anticipate how uncomfortable I would be. I can already know how limited my interactions would be because I was holding a woman’s hand.
But I could walk into First Congregational United Church of Christ, the church I’ve been working at, holding my fiancée’s hand, and I would warmly be welcomed and asked to introduce her. They’d ask me how long we’ve been together. They’d ask what we do for a living.
And I’d like to think that maybe this would also happen at our old church, but even if it did, I can’t say that it would be followed up with genuine friendship. Maybe a “hello” or a handshake here and there coming and going from church, but I’m pretty convinced that would be it.
And hey, maybe I’m a little far-fetched. But in all reality, a lot of people would agree that this is somewhat spot on. And I’m not ashamed to write a controversial post because I’m not afraid of who I love and the way I love and the person I am.
The Same As the Different 